Shabby Chic for Shabby Chicks

It's amazing what a difference one letter can make.  I've always thought of the term "shabby chic" as a bit of a self gratification session (I'm trying hard not to swear!)

There is also some kind of brilliantly simple diabolical thinking going on here.  Whoever came up with shabby chic is one clever monkey.  I'm going to take a guess as to what prompted this movement.  One woman or man had a garage full of stuff.  People came and viewed the stuff at a garage sale and said "wow, your stuff's really old, rusty and the paint's peeling off.  I wouldn't give you 20 cents for that rusty oak barrel or that crappy sign that says "flour" that has cobwebs all over it.  Your junk sucks."

So this woman or man, after not selling a thing at their garage sale, developed a plan.  S/he would put a display ad in the local paper, showing all the old rusty, paint peeling crap in a large country-style room, complete with polished floorboards, lace doileys, white tablecloths, white curtains, another bunch of doileys, a couple of pot plants and a headline for the picture "shabby chic".  And thus, the shabby chic movement was created, giving all people from all walks of life the opportunity to sell a rusty bike on ebay for $400 to a clueless yuppie who is willing to buy all your paint-peeling, oxidising junk at premium prices.  And everyone was happy.

And hey, if you want to make your place into a Jane Austen on coke meets Barbara Cartland nightmare then go ahead.  I have developed an irrational fear of lace, doileys and all-white rooms.  And floral bedspreads.    So a shabby chic room for me would be like some kind of interrogation room.  I'd end up telling everything, even though nobody would be asking me any questions.  I'd tell where the gold is buried and the combination to a non-existant jewel safe, just to get out of there.  If someone brought out the iced Vo-Vos I might even scream.  Or run.  Or both. 

What I love even more is when people get this wrong.  Apparently you can buy a table from a "shabby chick", which is in my opinion, too much information for a simple buyer/seller relationship.

I do appreciate her honesty, though.  If you want to create your own shabby chic wonderland, more power to you.  Just don't be too surprised if one of those creepy-assed dolls moves when you're not looking.

technorati tags: shabby chic, shabby chick, rustic, provincial, french decorating, home, decorating, rusty, overpriced

Cappuccino vs Caffe Latte

Have you ever wondered about the difference between caffe latte and cappuccino? Many don't know the difference, including the people who serve them.

Let's start with cappuccino. Cappuccino comes from the Capuchin friars - some say it refers to the colour of their robes, others say it refers to the friars' distinctive hairdo - bald in the middle and hair ringed around the head like a headband. Whatever the reason, we have the wonderful caffeinated beverage, coffee, steamed milk, and a large head of foam topped with a ring or a pattern of cinnamon, cocoa or chocolate sprinkles.

Latte, or caffe latte means "coffee and milk". So, unsurprisingly, the drink consists of coffee and a boatload of milk. This is often served in a glass with a napkin wrap to stop you burning your fingers. It is more similar to a flat white than a cappuccino, only the caffe latte contains more milk. According to Wikipedia, the drink was popularised in Seattle in the 1980s and is still hugely popular today.

Which brings me to my daily battle with take away coffees. I love to drink a take away cappuccino, lift off the lid and lick off the foam and chocolate from the inside. Perhaps not the daintiest look, but that's how I do it.  Only a cappuccino can provide this experience, so I order a cappuccino every time I get a coffee.

For some reason, my saying "Cappuccino" sounds distinctly like "Caffe Latte" to the person behind the counter.  I walk out only to find that I have a milky coffee and no foam, no sprinkles, no fun.   Apparently the rise of caffe latte in Seattle was so powerful, that nobody believes you anymore when you ask for a cappuccino.  They think "poor thing, she's obviously not keeping up with the times.  I'll do her a favour and make her a latte so she won't be excruciatingly embarrassed."

I would like to release an open letter to my particular local cafe, however this can apply to cafes around the world:

Dear "Barista",
You are actually Italian, so you should know better than to confuse a cappuccino with a caffe latte.  I know it's hard for you and that I am the only person since 1989 to ask for a cappuccino since everyone is sooo hip to the latte thing, but I-don't-care.  I want my daggy outmoded cappuccino, I want it brimming with foam and chocolate sprinkles.  Kindly make mine frothy, I don't want a hot milk with a dash of coffee in it, I don't care if Kate Moss is doing it.


sincerely,
Proud (if not fashionably challenged) cappuccino drinker

technorati tags: cappuccino, latte, caffe latte, cafe latte, capucin, friar, barista, cappuccino vs caffe latte, coffee, cafe

Signs For Your Business

The sign is often the first thing people see when they come to your place of business. The important question to ask is what does your sign say about you? I have seen signs that appear to be thrown together with sticky lettering and cheap wood. This is the kind of impression you do not want to make with your customers. As they say, you only get one chance to make a first impression.

On the other hand, if you walk into an office, store or other business and see a brushed metal, machine cut logo with spiffy lettering, you will think to yourself "these guys mean business".   If you really want to get it done right, Impact Signs are professional corporate signage specialists a with professional installation and service and no-nonsense quote process. If you are after bronze / metal lettering or custom designs, the turnaround is fast, so you can get back to the business of running your business.

If you want a professionally made sign, Impact Signs is a member of the the American Marketing Association and provide creative, professional solutions to your signage needs.

Who Profiles Your Browsing Habits?

As you shop, browse and scour the web, have you ever wondered who is profiling your browsing habits?

Once, when searching for a yoga mat and book on Amazon, I became alarmed when I started to see ads appearing on blogs featuring "yoga mats" and "yoga books".  Tick one for Amazon, they profile your shopping habits and then try to tailor suggestions based on your previous choices.  Some of us find this useful but others will be thinking "what else are they finding out about me?"

Most of us know that Facebook profiles its users.  Recently, it has come to light that Facebook is profiling you even when you are logged out of the Facebook homepage.  It seems people need to start enabling "Private Browsing" in Firefox, deleting cookies and blocking certain third party applications in Twitter, Facebook and every other social network or shopping site.

But there may actually be a rather ingenious way to ferret these profilers out.

You could try browsing for things you would never normally search for.

As an experiment, this morning I visited the KKK website, looked up Hitler and S.S. Halloween costumes, checked out white power memorabilia and Nazi uniform collectibles.

Why, you may ask? Have I gone all white supremacist / racist / nuts?

No, I was just researching an article for "Inappropriate and Bad Halloween Costumes" for one of my other blogs, "Halloween Holidays".

However, now that I have surfed for these outrageous topics, it will be glaringly obvious if someone has used this information to "profile" my browsing habits.

If I start seeing ads for "Grand Dragon Costumes" or "SS Uniforms" it will be clear that this information has been recorded and used for advertising purposes.

The emergence of Google's new +1 network has raised some important questions relating to privacy.  If you have a profile in a social network (Google +1), and then use a search engine (Google) to browse, it is possible that this information will be used in some way to market to you in the future.  Worse still, your profile can be linked to certain interests, which may make some a little nervous for those who have done research on offensive and inappropriate topics.

technorati tags: privacy, google, google 1, profile, browsing habits, facebook, social networking,

Gadgets for Geeks

I am a geek.  There.  I said it.  Sometimes it's important to get these things out in the open so we can grow and move on.  So I love anything geeky, be it sci-fi related, gadgety or gizmo-y.  Geeky Gadgets is a nifty site with links to gadgets, geeky things and coupons for the online acquisition of gadgets (an important pastime, and a personal fave of mine).  There are some fun posts on such wonders of the sacred tomes to nerd wisdom:

I of course have bought, cataloged, memorized and translated this book into 7 different languages, including Klingon.  It contains references to Yoda, who has shaped my philosophy much more than any religious organization could manage.  It was Yoda who equated fear with anger, and espoused the Ghandi-esque path of non-aggression and zen fighting.  After all, if you are an evil angry dude, what do you do when the other dude refuses to fight, or puts down their weapon.  Yoda taught the most important lesson of resolving conflict - mess with the other dude's head.  A lot.

This wacky site provides all things required by a man who shuns fresh air, the sun, vegetables, eats too much junk food and lives in his mother's basement.

I'm looking at you, Warlock.

Dear Mr Ambrose Weckkinbeck

I seem to be a target for spam lately.  Yesterday I got a text message from a ridiculously long phone number reading:
@===@
)"EID" )
/ "Mub /
(arik" (
@===@
I think that @ and = thing is supposed to be a scroll.

It reads:

"May Allah bless U and your family!"


Well that's nice. Couple of points though,

1. I'm not a Muslim, or in fact religious in any way shape or form
2. I'm not rabid enough to text back "die godless A-rab" either

So whatever they were hoping for - ie. "Thank you brother, may Allah bless you as well" or "I will find out where you live and git you just like Osama", they ain't gonna get it from me.

Another couple of points. They can't spell Eid Mubarak properly but they did send it at the right time, as Ramadan has just ended. A little bit of research goes a long way.  I'm guessing it's just a run of the mill spam thing, but I can see some people receiving it happily, and sending back "Eid Mubarak blessings to you too.  Just one thing, who are you and how did you get my number?" or freaking out completely and throwing the phone over the ranch fence and running in the general direction of Alaska.

My next spam adventure happened this morning when I received a totally official looking (*insert sarcasm here*) email from Mr Ambrose Wekkinbeck. Well, with a name like that I can't help but be reassured of its authenticity. It just sounds like the kind of name you can trust. Not made up at all.

Here is an excerpt of this earnest letter written by good natured people who just want to get my "missing funds" to me so they can sleep at night, knowing they have done the world a great service.

"Due to this lost of Funds of your's which was suppose to be given to you but failed to."

When I studied grammar at primary school, high school and university, not once did I dare consider indulging in any number of these cardinal sins. This person deserves to be tied up in a small room with an audio recording of "Introduction to The Grammar of English" for desecrating a poor defenseless sentence.

Apparently, the object of the exercise is to fleece people out of anything between $180 and $396 to cover "shipping fees" for an ATM card. That's one heavy ATM card. If anyone is stupid enough to pay an exorbitant shipping fee to an illiterate stranger with a made up name, they really can't blame anyone else when their accounts get drained. I guess you could call it a stupidity test.

That said, I feel quite sure there is a special circle of hell reserved for spammers and identity thieves. And I'm not even religious.

They end the last part of the email with "Thanks and God bless you and your family."

Spooky eh?

So, in the interests of reciprocating this earnest outreach of human goodness, here is my response (posted here only, not emailed!):

Deer Mistir Ambrowse Wekkinbecc,

!Git Stuff'd.

yorz sincerelly,
LjPPPPPP

technorati tags: spam, eid, mubarak, text, scam, funds, bank, bad grammar

We're Not Going To Take It - Twisted Sister

In the 1980s the parent group PMRC (Parents Music Resource Centre) formed from the "Wives of Washington", tried to ban songs containing 'obscene' lyrics, targeting Twisted Sister along with 15 other bands they dubbed "The Filthy Fifteen".  These parent groups (one of which included Tipper Gore) attempted to use the courts to censor rock music into oblivion.  Had they won the case, the PMRC would have chosen which music is appropriate and not appropriate based on their own particular values.  As a result of these hearings, the "parental advisory" stickers were born.

Note:  Dee Snyder says one swear word in this documentary.  I'm sure you've all heard it before but if you don't want to hear it, don't watch it!






The Glee Project doing "We're Not Going to Take It" by Twisted Sister.
This is not particularly appropriate as music for an "Idol" style reality TV show considering the history and the subject matter of the song.

This song was written to take a stand against the establishment, against narrow minded people and against unfair censorship.  It's a song about Rock N' Roll, freedom of speech and the right to choose your own destiny. 

Glee on the other hand is paint-by-numbers, establishment-endorsed karaoke, not Rock N' Roll.
And no, pretending to break a plastic guitar doesn't count. 

The fundamental problem with this picture is that PMRC would probably have endorsed Glee and its inoffensive, sanitised "Musical Theatre" show.

People on you tube have said that this Glee Project clip "Rocks".  They wouldn't know Rock music if they tripped over it.   


Here is the link to the actual song, performed as nature intended:
We're Not Going To Take It - Twisted Sister

technorati tags: twisted sister, we're not going to take it, glee project, glee, dee snyder, tipper gore, PMRC, parental advisory, explicit lyrics