Signs For Your Business

The sign is often the first thing people see when they come to your place of business. The important question to ask is what does your sign say about you? I have seen signs that appear to be thrown together with sticky lettering and cheap wood. This is the kind of impression you do not want to make with your customers. As they say, you only get one chance to make a first impression.

On the other hand, if you walk into an office, store or other business and see a brushed metal, machine cut logo with spiffy lettering, you will think to yourself "these guys mean business".   If you really want to get it done right, Impact Signs are professional corporate signage specialists a with professional installation and service and no-nonsense quote process. If you are after bronze / metal lettering or custom designs, the turnaround is fast, so you can get back to the business of running your business.

If you want a professionally made sign, Impact Signs is a member of the the American Marketing Association and provide creative, professional solutions to your signage needs.

Who Profiles Your Browsing Habits?

As you shop, browse and scour the web, have you ever wondered who is profiling your browsing habits?

Once, when searching for a yoga mat and book on Amazon, I became alarmed when I started to see ads appearing on blogs featuring "yoga mats" and "yoga books".  Tick one for Amazon, they profile your shopping habits and then try to tailor suggestions based on your previous choices.  Some of us find this useful but others will be thinking "what else are they finding out about me?"

Most of us know that Facebook profiles its users.  Recently, it has come to light that Facebook is profiling you even when you are logged out of the Facebook homepage.  It seems people need to start enabling "Private Browsing" in Firefox, deleting cookies and blocking certain third party applications in Twitter, Facebook and every other social network or shopping site.

But there may actually be a rather ingenious way to ferret these profilers out.

You could try browsing for things you would never normally search for.

As an experiment, this morning I visited the KKK website, looked up Hitler and S.S. Halloween costumes, checked out white power memorabilia and Nazi uniform collectibles.

Why, you may ask? Have I gone all white supremacist / racist / nuts?

No, I was just researching an article for "Inappropriate and Bad Halloween Costumes" for one of my other blogs, "Halloween Holidays".

However, now that I have surfed for these outrageous topics, it will be glaringly obvious if someone has used this information to "profile" my browsing habits.

If I start seeing ads for "Grand Dragon Costumes" or "SS Uniforms" it will be clear that this information has been recorded and used for advertising purposes.

The emergence of Google's new +1 network has raised some important questions relating to privacy.  If you have a profile in a social network (Google +1), and then use a search engine (Google) to browse, it is possible that this information will be used in some way to market to you in the future.  Worse still, your profile can be linked to certain interests, which may make some a little nervous for those who have done research on offensive and inappropriate topics.

technorati tags: privacy, google, google 1, profile, browsing habits, facebook, social networking,

Gadgets for Geeks

I am a geek.  There.  I said it.  Sometimes it's important to get these things out in the open so we can grow and move on.  So I love anything geeky, be it sci-fi related, gadgety or gizmo-y.  Geeky Gadgets is a nifty site with links to gadgets, geeky things and coupons for the online acquisition of gadgets (an important pastime, and a personal fave of mine).  There are some fun posts on such wonders of the sacred tomes to nerd wisdom:

I of course have bought, cataloged, memorized and translated this book into 7 different languages, including Klingon.  It contains references to Yoda, who has shaped my philosophy much more than any religious organization could manage.  It was Yoda who equated fear with anger, and espoused the Ghandi-esque path of non-aggression and zen fighting.  After all, if you are an evil angry dude, what do you do when the other dude refuses to fight, or puts down their weapon.  Yoda taught the most important lesson of resolving conflict - mess with the other dude's head.  A lot.

This wacky site provides all things required by a man who shuns fresh air, the sun, vegetables, eats too much junk food and lives in his mother's basement.

I'm looking at you, Warlock.

Dear Mr Ambrose Weckkinbeck

I seem to be a target for spam lately.  Yesterday I got a text message from a ridiculously long phone number reading:
@===@
)"EID" )
/ "Mub /
(arik" (
@===@
I think that @ and = thing is supposed to be a scroll.

It reads:

"May Allah bless U and your family!"


Well that's nice. Couple of points though,

1. I'm not a Muslim, or in fact religious in any way shape or form
2. I'm not rabid enough to text back "die godless A-rab" either

So whatever they were hoping for - ie. "Thank you brother, may Allah bless you as well" or "I will find out where you live and git you just like Osama", they ain't gonna get it from me.

Another couple of points. They can't spell Eid Mubarak properly but they did send it at the right time, as Ramadan has just ended. A little bit of research goes a long way.  I'm guessing it's just a run of the mill spam thing, but I can see some people receiving it happily, and sending back "Eid Mubarak blessings to you too.  Just one thing, who are you and how did you get my number?" or freaking out completely and throwing the phone over the ranch fence and running in the general direction of Alaska.

My next spam adventure happened this morning when I received a totally official looking (*insert sarcasm here*) email from Mr Ambrose Wekkinbeck. Well, with a name like that I can't help but be reassured of its authenticity. It just sounds like the kind of name you can trust. Not made up at all.

Here is an excerpt of this earnest letter written by good natured people who just want to get my "missing funds" to me so they can sleep at night, knowing they have done the world a great service.

"Due to this lost of Funds of your's which was suppose to be given to you but failed to."

When I studied grammar at primary school, high school and university, not once did I dare consider indulging in any number of these cardinal sins. This person deserves to be tied up in a small room with an audio recording of "Introduction to The Grammar of English" for desecrating a poor defenseless sentence.

Apparently, the object of the exercise is to fleece people out of anything between $180 and $396 to cover "shipping fees" for an ATM card. That's one heavy ATM card. If anyone is stupid enough to pay an exorbitant shipping fee to an illiterate stranger with a made up name, they really can't blame anyone else when their accounts get drained. I guess you could call it a stupidity test.

That said, I feel quite sure there is a special circle of hell reserved for spammers and identity thieves. And I'm not even religious.

They end the last part of the email with "Thanks and God bless you and your family."

Spooky eh?

So, in the interests of reciprocating this earnest outreach of human goodness, here is my response (posted here only, not emailed!):

Deer Mistir Ambrowse Wekkinbecc,

!Git Stuff'd.

yorz sincerelly,
LjPPPPPP

technorati tags: spam, eid, mubarak, text, scam, funds, bank, bad grammar

We're Not Going To Take It - Twisted Sister

In the 1980s the parent group PMRC (Parents Music Resource Centre) formed from the "Wives of Washington", tried to ban songs containing 'obscene' lyrics, targeting Twisted Sister along with 15 other bands they dubbed "The Filthy Fifteen".  These parent groups (one of which included Tipper Gore) attempted to use the courts to censor rock music into oblivion.  Had they won the case, the PMRC would have chosen which music is appropriate and not appropriate based on their own particular values.  As a result of these hearings, the "parental advisory" stickers were born.

Note:  Dee Snyder says one swear word in this documentary.  I'm sure you've all heard it before but if you don't want to hear it, don't watch it!






The Glee Project doing "We're Not Going to Take It" by Twisted Sister.
This is not particularly appropriate as music for an "Idol" style reality TV show considering the history and the subject matter of the song.

This song was written to take a stand against the establishment, against narrow minded people and against unfair censorship.  It's a song about Rock N' Roll, freedom of speech and the right to choose your own destiny. 

Glee on the other hand is paint-by-numbers, establishment-endorsed karaoke, not Rock N' Roll.
And no, pretending to break a plastic guitar doesn't count. 

The fundamental problem with this picture is that PMRC would probably have endorsed Glee and its inoffensive, sanitised "Musical Theatre" show.

People on you tube have said that this Glee Project clip "Rocks".  They wouldn't know Rock music if they tripped over it.   


Here is the link to the actual song, performed as nature intended:
We're Not Going To Take It - Twisted Sister

technorati tags: twisted sister, we're not going to take it, glee project, glee, dee snyder, tipper gore, PMRC, parental advisory, explicit lyrics

Winter!! Uggh!! (Boots)

Uggh!!  It's winter.  So instead of saying "ugg" perhaps it's time to start wearing them!!

I'm sure I'm not alone in not liking winter one little bit. But, it is a good time to stock up on essential winter wear.  Can you be fashionable AND cold?  Methinks so....

Winter Essentials:

Polar fleece blanket

Winter Essential #1: Polar fleece blanket
Perfect for putting over your knees in the car during those chilly early mornings.  Use them on the couch, on your bed for extra warmth, the possibilities are endless!

Ugg Boots

 
Winter Essential #2: Ugg Boots
Keep your toes toasty with fleecy uggs this winter.  Comfy for wearing around the house and getting cosy in front of the fire.


For some extra style points, get the Jimmy Choo Ugg

Jimmy Choo Ugg

American Eagle Outfitters Wool Coat

Winter Essential #3: Woollen Coat
If you are wandering around the place and it's 5 degrees outside, it's woollen coat time. I predict a resurgence of wool this year...

Wool scarf

And last but not least, Winter Essential #4:  Wool scarf
Protect your neck and ears from the cold with a warm and stylish scarf.  Top off your look with warmth and style!

technorati tags: wool, winter, scarf, jimmy choo, ugg, ugg boot, wool coat, fashion, accessories, style, polar fleece, polar fleece

Loser Macaroni Rascals

As you may already have guessed, I am a fan of translations.  Especially when the result fails to convey the correct meaning of what you are trying to translate.  Especially especially when that result is funny....

Our friends at TVFix have put together an awesome collection of badly translated tv titles.   I feel it is my duty to share them with you:

GLEE = LOSERS
Curious English-Russian translation, however I'm inclined to think that Dave Grohl may agree with this one.
 

JERSEY SHORE = THE NEW JERSEY LIFE OF MACARONI RASCALS
Only Japan could come up with this one.  And I Love them for it.  I can be a macaroni rascal myself when I am hungry enough.  Oh, not that kind of rascal...

THE BRADY BUNCH = THREE GIRLS, THREE BOYS
This is a German translation, Germans being known for their outlandish wackiness.  If they wanted to be pedantic, they should have called it three girls, three boys, one lady, one man and one maid who makes wisecracks.  But they probably didn't have enough room...

BEWITCHED = IN LOVE WITH A WITCH
(German translation) I'm sure many people have had this problem. At least they didn't call it "Nose Wiggler"...

MURDER, SHE WROTE = MURDER IS HER HOBBY
Suddenly I'm looking at Angela Lansbury in a new way...  She seems so nice and unassuming... This is also a German effort.  Again, they must have run out of room from trying to call it "Writing about murder is her hobby"...

KNIGHT RIDER = EL AUTO FANTASTICO (THE FANTASTIC CAR)
I'm willing to go along with this one.  That car IS pretty fantastic...


And I've saved my favourite one for last:

THE X-FILES = AT THE BOUNDARIES OF REALITY
French translation.  Talk about taking the awesomeness out of a title.  Why didn't they just go with "Exciting stuff that nobody ever hears about",  "FBI guys with torches who discover weird things", "Nobody believes me that aliens are actually real", or "Even though I have an implant in my head I seem quite normal to passers by".  Again, probably a space thing...  (yuk, yuk!)