Monday, February 18, 2008
Save Your Money and Your Butt
Each week I spend at least an hour and a half, maybe more, often a lot less, on walking with hand weights.
And I find out that some people are paying money, that's right, thousands of dollars, to get a bigger butt.
Just eat more Sara Lee desserts!!
Stock up on choccies!
Throw away your Pilates equipment and books on yoga.
Switch to full fat lattes.
But, for the love of God, do not withdraw thousands of dollars from your savings account so you can have a larger ass.
Perhaps I could start a new craze.
I'll sell books, DVDs, and I'll even bring seminars to a town near you.
It will be called.
"The big butt diet"
People will go crazy. Ever since J-Lo came on the scene people have wanted bigger booties. Beyonce is another bum icon. Alicia Keys is getting there.
For only $49.95 I'll give you a DVD on how to avoid exercise (especially in the gluteal area!) and how to make friends with every deli owner in your neighbourhood.
I'll give you a special "butt expander pack" consisting of a large rubber band and a pointless lever. But I'll show J-Lo on the machine in the infomercial which will prove beyond a doubt that this thing really works.
And lastly, I'll hold personal development seminars so you can talk to your "inner butt" and find out why it hasn't been allowed to grow.
Just call 1880-BUTT-EXPANDER for further details
Cheques will not be honoured.
Thursday, February 14, 2008
Australia Says Sorry
For the first time in a long time, I am proud to be an Australian.
View the apology to Indigenous Australians delivered by Kevin Rudd in Federal Parliament :
AUSTRALIA'S APOLOGY
Today we honour the Indigenous peoples of this land, the oldest continuing cultures in human history.
We reflect on their past mistreatment.
We reflect in particular on the mistreatment of those who were Stolen Generations – this blemished chapter in our nation’s history.
The time has now come for the nation to turn a new page in Australia’s history by righting the wrongs of the past and so moving forward with confidence to the future.
We apologise for the laws and policies of successive Parliaments and governments that have inflicted profound grief, suffering and loss on these our fellow Australians.
We apologise especially for the removal of Aboriginal and Torres Strait Islander children from their families, their communities and their country.
For the pain, suffering and hurt of these Stolen Generations, their descendants and for their families left behind, we say sorry.
To the mothers and the fathers, the brothers and the sisters, for the breaking up of families and communities, we say sorry.
And for the indignity and degradation thus inflicted on a proud people and a proud culture, we say sorry.
We the Parliament of Australia respectfully request that this apology be received in the spirit in which it is offered as part of the healing of the nation.
For the future we take heart; resolving that this new page in the history of our great continent can now be written.
We today take this first step by acknowledging the past and laying claim to a future that embraces all Australians.
A future where this Parliament resolves that the injustices of the past must never, never happen again.
A future where we harness the determination of all Australians, Indigenous and non-Indigenous, to close the gap that lies between us in life expectancy, educational achievement and economic opportunity.
A future where we embrace the possibility of new solutions to enduring problems where old approaches have failed.
A future based on mutual respect, mutual resolve and mutual responsibility.
A future where all Australians, whatever their origins, are truly equal partners, with equal opportunities and with an equal stake in shaping the next chapter in the history of this great country, Australia.
Time To Reduce Debt
Wednesday, February 13, 2008
Canon Powershot A460

I got this camera around Christmas and had a ball finding out all the features and putting them to good use. One of my favourite features is the sepia mode, in which you can record a movie in sepia so it looks like one of those old newsreel movies. To do this my partner just walks really fast and blinks a lot. Then he waves and jerkily does a golf swing. He even pulled up his jeans to make plus fours to add to the authenticity. For those of you who aren't familiar with plus fours, here is an example:

The other settings include macro, beach, snow, foliage, nightshot and indoor. Now I am getting the hang of the settings I have realised that "foliage" is the best setting to use at the golf course. I wish I had been able to take it to the MFS Women's Australian Open because I could have got a number of great shots of Karrie Webb - she walked past me once, I watched her doing her practice putts and followed her round until we got tired and went to find a beer. We got tired by the 6th hole at Kingston Heath so I can't imagine how the players must have felt. We ended up sitting under a tree and enjoying the perfect view (4 metres away and in the shade!) of the 15th tee (pictured) and the 16th fairway. In the photo of the 15th tee, I would have been just to the right, a few metres away.


My partner went to get our beers so I sat under this shady tree and watched various players from Australia, Korea, England, Finland, Spain and Italy tee off with nobody else around. It was amazing, like I had my own box seat. When Karrie Webb arrived, so did the crowd, just as I was wondering where all the people had got to. Later I found out that I had been to the 2nd best golf course in Australia, and 21st in the world.
When I think about it, the golf course looked like no course I've ever been to. The greens were like felt and the fairways were like most greens I have putted on.
The light rough was like the fairways at Elsternwick Golf course:

and the rough was almost exactly like the fairways at Studley Park Golf Course.

Hehehe!
One of my favourite features on the camera is the macro setting. I spent a large portion of my holidays bent over small flowers and leaves, testing out the macro. I chose a couple of interesting subjects with which to do my experiments - (click to enlarge):
This flower was actually half the size of my fingernail, maybe smaller

Yes, I did a macro of a VB label. It looks even more refreshing close up.
I would definitely recommend this camera - it's reasonably priced at around $120 and does everything you are likely to be needing, unless of course you are a photography enthusiast, in which case you would have bought a digital SLR with lens attachments.
A great camera for taking holiday snaps, be it landscapes, people or places.
All photos except Kingston Heath taken by Canon Powershot A460
Thursday, February 07, 2008
The Pursuit of Happiness
E.L.F. More Free Stuff!!

spf 15 foundation

and lip plumping gloss

from eyeslipsface and when it arrived, the foundation was broken. I sent a simple email to their customer service section saying that the foundation was broken and whoops I also got the wrong colour so could I please have Tone 1 rather than Tone 2? I thought I might have been pushing it with the last request. So I waited, and a few days later I got a surprise. Not one but two Tone 1 foundations arrived, plus a super shimmery "hypershine" lip gloss in "fairy".

I am liking these guys...
Monday, February 04, 2008
Congratulations Karrie Webb!!

Congratulations to Karrie Webb for winning the MFS Women's Australian Open 2008. Again!!
The tournament was held at Kingston Heath and I WAS THERE!!! Yep. That's right. I was so excited standing not more than a metre from Karrie Webb and her caddy. I could even read his yardage book and see the diagrams. I always wondered what it is that caddies say to the golfer before a shot.
I finally got my answer.
"Trust yourself." he said as Karrie lined up her tee shot.
Very Obi Wan.
And she did just that, winning in a playoff with Shin Ji-Yai. It was described as "tense". Tense!! I wasn't even there on the last day but I would not even get up to go to the loo until the playoff was over.
All I can say is...
Champion.
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